MEET OUR ZOE JEAN

5/17/16



Over 7 months late, but better late then never right? So sorry I have been absent on here! Our Zoe girl definitely likes to keep us on our toes. I'm hoping to get back into the swing of things. In the meantime I do have a little mommy blog where I like to dish on all things motherhood, so if you ever miss me feel free to pop over there every once in a while!

I contemplated for a long time whether I wanted to write Zoe's birth story. A part of me wanted to leave some things between me and her but I have always loved and appreciated others birth stories so I thought, hey why not!?

Zoe Jean Taylor! Born with long brown hair, bright blue eyes, a button nose, and her famous grumpy little expression. Zoe was born on October 15, 2015 (her due date) at 1:52am. I can't believe that 7 months have gone by since she made her way into this world. At the same time I feel like I've known her forever. Zoe loooooves to be held and cuddled 24/7. The only way she will take her naps is in my arms. Luckily she is an amazing sleeper at night (10 hours straight). She just started sleeping on her stomach and it scares me half to death. I get no sleep now because I just sit and watch her baby monitor all night long. She loves being on her tummy finally and she's our little turn-table going around in circles. Now if only she can master moving forward and back. She is the funniest in her bouncer. She can be in that for hours drooling, dancing, yelling, jumping. I love watching her little feet and legs do ballet moves. She has the funniest laugh, and her smiles melt my heart ever time. She loves to burrow into my shoulder when she gets bashful with strangers. But nothing makes my heart burst more than seeing her first thing in the morning when Eric and I walk into her room. Her whole face lights up and she squirms her little body around as fast as can be.

As for Zoe's birth, I somehow knew everything would be okay. I'm not someone who has high pain tolerance. In fact, I always feared becoming pregnant because the mere thought of giving birth scared me to the core. When I actually became pregnant, however, I had this overwhelming sense of calm wash over me. Call me crazy. Or maybe it was because at thirteen years old my doctor told me I had birthing hips (whatever that means). The morning before Zoe was born I woke up to some cramping that was consistent with the 5-1-1 that you learn about in your birthing class. I remember I got so excited because I thought I was in labor and was somehow blessed with the easiest contractions ever (boy was I wrong). In our cloud of excitement we rushed to the hospital at 6AM only to find that I was dilated to 2 cm (which I had been for over 2 weeks at that point) and could not be admitted. This was after they had me walk the halls of the hospital for an hour and then turned away. Longest hour ever. My hips and back were killing me, and I probably had to stop to take a bathroom break every 10 minutes. They gave me a shot (IN MY BUTT) for the pain and sent me on my way. Honest to everything, I think that shot was the worst of all my pregnancy. It was like 30 seconds of burning agony shooting down my leg. I don't know what that shot did but I swear after the burning sensation subsided I didn't even feel pregnant anymore. In fact, once I got back home and took a nap, I went on a two mile walk, played some basketball and bounced on a bouncy ball for 30 minutes before I realized I was being crazy and laid back down again. It was a few hours later that night that all the fun started.

After the hospital we decided to head to my parents house instead since they lived a little closer to the hospital than us. Around 6 o'clock my family gathered around downstairs for dinner while I rested in my parents room watching TV and eating chicken noodle soup. An hour later Eric decided to check on my and found me curled up in a ball in agony. All those breathing techniques they teach you in your birthing class go right out the window when you are actually in labor. Afraid that I would get turned away at the hospital again I decided to get in my parents jacuzzi bath and have Eric massage my lower back to hold off. After two hours my mom came in and happily declared that I was definitely in labor and we needed to get the heck out of here. The next little part is kind of a blur. I remember Eric driving while my mom and I sat in the back. I was in back labor (Zoe was facing the wrong way) and honestly that is some serious pain you guys. I remember I was trying to act brave but my mom told me I would feel a lot better if I just let it out. Apparently I screamed the rest of the way to the hospital (I don't remember this at all, HA). Once we got to the maternity parking garage I do, however, remember yelling at Eric to just picking a parking spot. Driving around in circles going up and up the ramps was making me nauseous. Once they brought me into the exam room it took about 10 minutes for the nurse to fill out my paperwork. She kept getting my birth date wrong (which she still ended up doing on Zoe's birth certificate). Apparently I am the youngest looking 47 year old. WHAT? After clearly showing pain on my face the nurse took pity on me and brought in a doctor who actually knew what she was doing. She broke my water which is the funniest sensation ever and admitted me through those glorious chamber doors and into the arms of the best labor and delivery nurse known to man, Rhonda. Love you Rhonda! I remember I was so afraid to get my IV (I heard that can be the worst part). Rhonda was smart though and stuck me right when I was at the height of one of my contractions. I didn't feel a thing. Once that was done I kindly demanded for the big drugs. This was another thing I was afraid of because I knew you had to hold really still and not move all the while being hunched over having contractions. The guy who did mine was so speedy. Again, didn't feel a thing. It probably helped because I went from 4cm to 8cm in one contraction during this time. Boy was I tired. Eric and I both took a little nap while my mom talked Rhonda's ear off. The next thing I knew I woke up feeling all kinds of pressure, and of course Eric was still sleeping in the corner.

I lay watching my contractions sky rocket off the little monitor and down again so rapidly, listening to my mom and Rhonda continue to talk about their own delivery experiences, while my mom brushed and braided my hair. Whenever I am stressed, sad or feeling anxious I love having my hair play with my hair. What is it about moms that instantly bring a sense of calm in our lives? After a little while I was getting stronger pressure down below. Eventually I just remember telling Rhonda to check me because I either was about to poop or baby girl was ready to make her debut. Rhonda kept saying it was too soon, but after enough persistence I convinced her to check me. She quickly agreed it was time for me to do some practice pushes. After pushing for about 4 seconds she told me to STOP immediately. She quickly said, "It's time for you to deliver" and went to go get the doctor. I remember quickly staring over at Eric in shock. Our whole lives were about to change in a matter or minutes. The doctor came in (unfortunately my doctor was not on call that night), I don't even remember her saying anything to me other than "Here comes the ring of fire" (for all you mama's out there you know what I'm talking about). Holding my own legs up I pushed three times and there she was. Seriously everything went by so fast. I remember the doctor told me to look down as they were pulling her out. I remember the first thing I asked while she was crowning was if she had hair (I don't know why but I just knew she would, even though I was a baldy). They quickly placed this sweet, tiny, crying baby on my chest. She was so warm and so perfect. Within seconds she tilted her pretty little head full of hair up at me, opened her eyes and stopped crying. The most unexplainable moment of us introducing ourselves to one another, like we were old fast friends. Her heavy eyes opening and closing as we breathed as one. I couldn't believe this little human was inside of me. That she was the one I was growing, feeding, talking to all this time. She was my built in best friend and she was finally here.

One of the greatest experiences was getting to see my mom and Eric take turns holding Zoe. They were so cute fawning over her and taking pictures with their cell phones. Why we didn't take ONE single picture with my nice camera (or a picture of the three of us as a brand new family, the world may never know)! Even cuter was watching Eric hover over Zoe while the nurse whisked her away to clean her and weight her. He was so cute being all worried and wanting to never take his eyes off her. He told me he wouldn't cry after she was born but he was a bowl full of gush. He'll probably kill me for telling you all this. Oh well 😉

By the start of my contractions at home and by the time Zoe was in my arms was a little less than 7 hours. I pushed for about 10 minutes. The longest part was delivering my placenta. That sucker didn't want to come out. The doctor had to rip it out in pieces which was uncomfortable to say the least but luckily I had a brand new baby to help distract me. After about 20 minutes the doctor finally started to sew me up, but quickly realized I still had some placenta left inside of me. She had to unstitch me and then stitch me back up again. By this time those good old drugs were starting to wear off. That was interesting.

The next two days were such a blur. I didn't sleep one wink. I was on such a high and wanted to attend to every little coo, cry, wiggle, and breath that my baby had to offer. She slept in my arms both nights. This may be why she still prefers to fall asleep in my arms for her naps every day. Oops. One thing I do wish people warned me about was the amount of interruption you will get in your recovery room. Honestly, it felt like every hour someone was coming in to either poke or prod me and Zoe. Even in the middle of the night. I'm hoping I'll be better prepared for that next time because that was no fun. It didn't help either that we had to stay for two nights due to Zoe being born in the middle of the night. Something about having to stay for a full 24 hours but not being able to be released in the middle of the night mumbo jumbo. Even being released from the hospital takes hours. The recovery nurse (1 or 100) comes in with lots of papers full of information for you to be aware of or to know. Thank goodness for Eric because I didn't understand one thing that woman was saying to me. I just had baby on the brain and wanted to get the heck out of there.

As I finish up typing this I'm watching Zoe sleeping through her baby monitor. Her little chest moving up and down, her perfect little face so peaceful. What I would give to know what she dreams about. I hope she knows how much I love her. I hope she knows how much she was wanted. I hope she knows her potential. I hope she knows she can accomplish anything. I hope she knows I am her biggest cheerleader. I hope she knows I will always be there for her.

*You can see more pictures of little Zoe on my Instagram or my mommy blog, Bed Head Blog!*

THE 52 LISTS PROJECT

9/10/15

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Did you ever watch The Oprah Winfrey Show? I used to be (still am) obsessed with Oprah and her positive energy and outlook on life. One of the things that she talked about regularly that helped her have such a positive attitude was keeping a gratitude journal, a journal where she would write down 5 things that she was grateful for each and every day. As a teenager I would go through hiccups of being depressed and I wanted so desperately to have that little outlet to bring sunshine back into my life. I was never very consistent with it, but when I was it really did help me to be happier.

When I first heard about the 52 Lists Project, I was instantly excited! It came at a time in my life where I'm going through so much transition that it's hard to think straight sometimes. So much about your life gets shifted when you become pregnant and have a baby. Life is no longer about you. All of your time and energy goes into thinking about the future, what all you have to do to get ready, and doctor visits, doctor visits, doctor visits. I've loved having moments throughout my day to hit the pause button and take some time for me. One of my favorite lists so far has been reflecting on my childhood dreams. We all have moments in our lives where we second guess ourselves, or think what am I meant or supposed to be doing. Reflecting so simply on the dreams I set out for myself when I was younger has really given me that spark of excitement back into my life! I really do recommend getting this book for yourself, whether to help bring direction or for memory keepsake, I promise you will love it!
Buy your copy here!

And just for fun: What dream job did you want when you were younger??

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DRESSING THE BUMP

9/9/15

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At 35 weeks, I love that I am finally in a stage of my pregnancy where people know that I'm pregnant. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I would be walking down a street and people would have to do double takes. I know what they were thinking, "home girl needs to lay off the cheeseburgers". Now all I get are cute little smiles every where I go. I'll take it!

Anyways, I looooove this dress so SO much! Even though it has long sleeves, it's light enough to wear on those hot Summer days, but enough coverage for rainy days too. Oh, and it is a maternity dress, but you could totally pull it off as just a regular dress afterwards (double bonus). *For those who have asked about my past maternity dresses they've seen on my Instagram, I've gotten all of mine from ASOS! ;)

5 "BACK TO SCHOOL" HAIRSTYLES

8/28/15

Hair posts are back people! Oh, how I've missed it! I'm constantly on Pinterest and seeing so much inspiration that I thought it needed to be shared with all of you!! And with school just around the corner (how is Summer already over?!), what better than some "hairspiration" for your first week back. 

Here are my 5 "back to school" hairstyles to wear throughout the week! One of the things I love the most about these looks is that they are all super easy and can be done in 2 minutes or less! No need to set those alarm clocks early. Let me know if you try this look out by tagging me in your instagram photos @tanyajtaylor
xo

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BABY SHOWER SNIPPETS

8/27/15

I had my first baby shower the other week put on by my baby sister and my best friend since childhood. Yay!! We spent the past few weeks coming up with ideas for decorations, games and the food. My sister is amazing when it comes to cooking and baking so I let her have free reign for the brunch. We had parfaits (yum!), a bagel bar, mini brunch frittatas, parmesan hash brown cups, pink lemonade, cucumber/lemon water, and homemade ice cream sandwiches from scratch. My mouths watering just thinking about it all. Why I didn't think to take pictures of it, the world may never know.

Instead of a "theme", we opted for a color scheme instead. Gold, pinks and creams. I had so much fun going through baby pictures of me and Eric (seriously, his big puppy dog eyes kill me every time!) and putting them in thrifted gold frames. My sister went to thrift stores and found cute animal figurines that she spray painted gold. And to keep with the dainty theme, we chose babies breath and put them all in mason jars and tied pink ribbon around the tops along side jasmine candles. My amazing mother-in-law also made cute tassels that we hung around the downstairs.

I'm not a big game person when it comes to baby or bridal showers so we kept them light hearted and fun. We played "Guess which babe" where both our parents wrote down 10 baby facts about us and guests had to guess which fact was about who. We also had "Wishes for babe" where everyone wrote down their wishes for our future baby girl. I think my favorite was my little niece Makenna who wrote that she hopes our baby will be "a nice dinosaur". Too cute! And to keep guests entertained we had a little crafts table where they had the opportunity to paint little wooden blocks that would go into the baby nursery.

To sign in, we had everyone write their names and little messages to the babe in Dr. Seuss's "ABC" book. And before guests left we had a gold backdrop to take polaroid pictures in front of. I plan to put all of these instax pictures in baby girls baby book so she knows all the amazing women who came out to celebrate her!

I was having too much fun during the shower that I didn't get around to taking pictures, but here are some snippets of the aftermath. So much love to all my friends who were able to make it! Love you all!!!!
xo

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^^ Some of my amazing guests! I wish I had gotten around to taking pictures with everyone. I love looking at these pictures every day. They are still keeping my dining table pretty. ^^
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^^ Pretty tassels from tassellove and "OH BABY" balloon letters from Oh Happy Day! ^^
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^^ My baby sister and best friend. Thanks for putting up with my hormonal craziness to make this day special. XOXOXOXOXO ^^
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^^ My girl, Gavi, flew in from Los Angeles just for my baby shower. It meant so much to me that she was there! When everyone left, Eric took this picture of us. It pretty much sums up our relationship to a T. ^^
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^^ My mom surprised me with this pretty maternity top (along with so many other amazing gifts) that I'm completely obsessed with! I snapped this picture just for her ;) ^^ 

"BUMP"DATE

8/24/15

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How Far Along? Almost 33 weeks!
Weight Gain: Weight gain during pregnancy is a very sensitive thing, and anyone feeling the need to comment on a woman's weight while on this journey (or in general) should look inward first. With that being said, this is my little online diary so for posterity purposes here we go. As of last week I have gained 15 pounds. I know that may not seem like a lot to some people, and it's not, but my doctor has assured me at each visit that I am on the right track for me. 
Maternity Clothes: Still going strong with my normal clothes, besides maternity dresses like this one (perfect for this hot summer Seattle has been having). I haven't caved with maternity pants just yet, but my pony tail bows are definitely getting good use. 
Sleep? What's that? Poor baby girl is very cramped in there. And I'm feeling the brunt of it (all those jabs and kicks are getting very strong). Add that with some intense braxton hicks, baby girl is making sure she is always known. 
Best Moment This Week: I had my first baby shower last week that my sister and best friend through for me. It was so fun to have such sweet friends and family come out and want to celebrate our new addition. Seeing their excitement just made me even more excited!
Weird Pregnancy Moment: With the lack of room, it's always crazy to look down and see a little foot or fist poking out from under my tummy. That and peeing every time I sneeze or cough (TMI?), fun stuff. 
Movement: I really don't think this girl sleeps at all. We are in for it....
Food Cravings: On repeat this week has been parfaits. Just thinking about it is making my mouth water. 
What I'm Looking Forward To: My next baby shower! Can't wait to see more family and friends, and to have everyone love on Baby T some more! :) 
xoxo

FOURTH IN WALLACE

7/13/15

I know this is a late but I wanted to share our little getaway to the mountains for the Fourth of July. We've started to make it a tradition over the years to head over to Eric's parents vacation home in Wallace, Idaho. If you are ever driving through the area and want to go antiquing, this is the place to be! Such a cute old mining town! *a million heart eye emojis*

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^^ Where I spent most of my time, the local rooftop pool. For $1 entry? Heck yes! ^^
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^^ We pulled over on the side of the road to pick some red, white and blue wildflowers for Fourth of July decorations. Lost in the wild! ^^
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One afternoon we hiked up to Upper Glidden Lake to take in the views and have some fun in the water. The lake was still pretty cold but we managed to float out to the middle on some tubes and take some pictures. We had the whole lake to ourselves which made it that much more magical.
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^^ Obsessing over my new Stila lipstick!! ^^
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^^ Aftermath from a early morning dirt biking ride. ^^
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^^ All in all I would say it was a very successful Fourth of July, full of yummy food, pretty locations and quality family time. Happy Fourth!! ^^