LOSS

This past weekend, an old friend of mine from high school passed away. It was unexpected and too soon, as she and her husband had their whole lives ahead of them. Although it has been three years since we had last talked, the word of her passing left my heart aching. She was a beautiful spirit, her sarcastic humor left everyone laughing, her smile warmed any room, she was fearless, sometimes brutally honest, and passionate. She knew what she wanted, who she was, and did not care what others thought of her. She was magical and one of a kind. My prayers continue to go out to her family, her husbands family, and all who knew them both.

As I continue to look at all of the lovely comments that people have left on her Facebook page since hearing of her passing, I am just blown away at all of the memories that people shared with her, even those from who barely knew her. It had me thinking. Why can't we ever say these things to people as soon as we see them. Why must we wait until someone is gone to share how truly special they were to us. Why can't we just say "You have a beautiful smile", "I never told you but you made me feel so welcome that day", "I wish I had your confidence","You were the kindest, most generous person. You pushed me to think outside the box, to be a better person." How amazing would it be to hear these things all the time. Why do we wait until it's too late. As I continue to read the beautiful comments that have been left for her and her husbands passing, I deeply pray that they knew how much they were loved, still loved.

When those around us pass away you can't help but take a step back and reflect on your own life. Is what we are doing worth our while? Does it make us happy? Do we keep in contact with the ones we love, and that bring us joy? Did we say I love you as many times as we could? Did we forgive? Did we try to improve every day? When we are young we make the mistake in thinking that we are invincible; that there will always be tomorrow. Such tragedy to these young individuals proves that we are not always promised tomorrow.

Please, take this time to live each day like it's your last. Hug your loved ones with meaning, say what you are feeling to those around you then and now. Say I love you. 

27 comments:

  1. Thoughts and prayers to your friend's family, TJ. How awful this has to be.

    My mom just found out yesterday that the teenage daughter of one of her old friends just passed away. Though the family has the assurance that she's now healed (she had cancer) and in Heaven, I cannot even imagine that loss.

    Love your last paragraph - nothing is more important than living life to its fullest, living for Him.

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  2. Hugs. Thank you for the reminders. xoxo

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  3. I'm so sorry for your loss, TJ. You're right.. Why do people wait until it is too late? There was a pastor at my church growing up who, along with his wife, had an extremely large marriage ministry. They helped point couples to God and heal marriages around the world. Anyway, he always used to ask the same question.. why do people wait until someone passes away to say nice things about them? Why not tell the person while they are still alive? While it still matters? So, at one of their many conferences, his wife got up on stage and read to everyone a eulogy that she had written for him. She told him how amazing he was, how much he means to her.. to their daughters. It was a moving speech. Once she was done, he came up on the stage and gave her a huge hug and kiss while everyone cheered. Years later (just a couple short years ago) he was killed in a car accident in Africa. Hundreds attended his funeral and there his wife re-read what she had read to him all those years ago.

    We just can't afford to take any moment for granted.

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  4. so sorry for your loss TJ! thanks for sharing this....big hug!

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  5. Beautiful words. I'm sorry to hear about your loss.

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  6. Oh no. So sorry to hear, TJ. My sincerest condolences. :-(((
    Hope you're coping okay. Hugs! And yes, you're so right about saying the things we wanna say, saying them NOW...not when it's too late. xo

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  7. beautiful words! thoughts and prayers to all that knew and loved them.

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  8. I recently had someone I really care about pass away, and really it changes you. It has definitely made me more aware of my day to day relationship with others. I'll be praying for you dear and for her family.
    xo Emma

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  9. Thanks for sharing these thoughts! I think all too often we take our time for granted...and other people's time too. We really do need to express our love while we still have the chance.

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  10. I'm very sorry about your loss, and am saddened to think that another bright young spirit has been taken so early.. Thank you for this post, though, it really does offer clarity and perspective!

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  11. i'm so sorry for you loss lovely lady. a similar thing happened to me a couple years ago. thank you so much for sharing this. people really need to get this through there heads. ALWAYS take the opportunity to tell those you love that you love them. my little brother and i always scream across the room that we love each other. i don't know why we started doing this, but it just happened. i think my family just thinks it is cute, but if we are ever in a public place, and i say, "i love you brother!" all enthusiastic, i am amazed at how many people are taken aback by it. like it isn't normal, or like they are confused. i just can't believe that would ever be a reaction from someone. it is like they are embarrassed to see siblings express love for each other. i don't know when this happened, but people really need to take down these walls, and express themselves and the love and appreciation they have for those around them. you truly never know how long you have with someone. thank you again for this amazing perspective, and for putting this out into the world.

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  12. I'm sorry for your loss. My friend and I had a conversation about this about two years ago when someone close to her passed away. Why do we wait? Why do we say it when they can't hear it anymore? She wrote me and our other friends notes thanking us for being her friend and what she liked about us and we later did the same thing. Thank you for reminding me and the rest of us of how special we each are and that we should let them know all the time.

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  13. I always think about this! I try to be kind to people, and make sure they know they are special! But it can be hard. We definitely don't think to do it enough. It's sad that death is what truly makes us see how important life is.

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  14. your writing is so fresh, and all the questions you pose are such such good questions. why do we hold it all in? i too wish people were more forthcoming about the beautiful comments we all undoubtedly have for each other.
    i am so sorry for your loss.

    bloganticipation.blogspot.com

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  15. I'm so sorry to hear this, TJ. It's so hard for the ones left behind, and I will certainly be thinking about and praying for you and those who knew them. What a terrible tragedy. I wish, too, that we all had the courage to say those things on a regular basis. It's so important, and so cherished, when love is openly shared.

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  16. I'm so sorry for your loss, my thoughts and prayers are with their families and friends.
    This post is very real and honest, is true that we always wait at the last moment and shouldn't be this way.
    Sending love.

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  17. Oh I'm so sorry for your loss. It's hard to process when we lose someone.. at any age, but especially at such a young age. Crying is good for grieving. Sending you lots of thoughts, prayers, love and condolences.

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  18. Absolutely love this. & LOVE that you said " Why can't we ever say these things to people as soon as we see them. Why must we wait until someone is gone to share how truly special they were to us" -- I could not agree more. Thanks for that beautiful reminder, girl.

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  19. I am so sorry to hear...and I absolutely agree, we all need to say how we feel to the ones who are near and dear to our hearts...life is so short and never any guarantees!!!

    xo Dinah @ sunshine super glam

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  20. Oh TJ I am so sorry for your loss. But thank you for this post; it's an important reminder to not take anyone or anything for granted.

    Sarah @ Life As Always

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  21. Oh I am so sorry for you loss. What you wrote is very true. And each day I have to remind myself how short our time here truly is. A fleeting moment in the grand scheme of things. Hugs!

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  22. *hugs* I am so sorry for your loss. I agree with you. It's so easy to take the ones in our lives for granted. We need to let them know more often how we feel about them. I love your blog and one of the things that I love about it is how honest and real you are. A lot of bloggers out there aren't themselves (or maybe I just feel that way). Sending prayers, positive thoughts and hugs your way!

    xo
    Rachel

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  23. Sorry about your friend, Tj! My feelings.

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  24. My dad emailed me the story the other night and I was so sad after reading it. I don't know her or any of her siblings, but it's such a tragic story. I'm so grateful for the knowledge of the eternal plan and that they can be together forever in heaven and raise their children!

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  25. A very good word. So sorry for your loss. It truly does make one think. And makes me want to love harder than I usually try.
    Praying for you.

    Nicole

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